{"id":599,"date":"2014-01-17T01:02:32","date_gmt":"2014-01-17T01:02:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jenfrederick.com\/?p=599"},"modified":"2014-01-17T01:02:32","modified_gmt":"2014-01-17T01:02:32","slug":"charlotte-chronicles-xii-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/charlotte-chronicles-xii-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Charlotte Chronicles XII"},"content":{"rendered":"

Don’t forget the release of Unraveled is just around the corner. We even have a pre order link if you are an iBooks reader. Pre Order link.<\/a><\/p>\n

I posted the entire first chapter of Unraveled<\/strong> here<\/a>.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Nathan
\n<\/em>
\nI spend most of the night with one eye open just waiting for Charlotte\u2019s parents to burst through the door but even with that anxiety hovering around the edges of my consciousness I don\u2019t leave. Charlotte\u2019s hand is tucked into mine is more effective than a chain bolted to the floor. I can tell that she is confused by my response to her and I am as well. These feelings came on so fast and neither of us are prepared. I had some vague idea Charlotte and I would end up together but that was in the future. Her being sick, nearly dying had changed things. But we aren’t ready. I’m not ready.<\/p>\n

The memory of the last time I had sex flicks through my mind and I get an instant erection. Nick is having more sex than me right now but I know I shouldn’t care. I know other guys would either be having sex with other girls or be taking Charlotte up on her offer. Although what she is offering I’m not sure. And it’s not like Charlotte and I are dating or even a couple. We’re connected though. For so long I’ve just taken for granted that she’ll be around when I’m ready for her. And right now she’s too young and I’m trying hard to push away those physical feelings. Emotional ones are okay but I feel two inches high whenever I get hard around her. But going off to another girl? That seems just as wrong now. Before, yeah, it was easy. The idea of not having sex for some interminable amount of time in the future is bleak. I wonder if I can die from a build up of sperm or if my dick really will fall off if I jerk it too much in the shower. Maybe it would be better if she left. If she was gone, wouldn’t it be easier for me to go without? No temptation around.<\/p>\n

I hold myself immobile so I don\u2019t disturb her sleep but she finally lets go right before dawn, about the time I usually get up and lift weights so I tell myself it\u2019s okay to leave her. She mumbles something but I don\u2019t catch it. Leaning over, I tuck the blankets around her and kiss her forehead.<\/p>\n

\u201cNaaaate.\u201d She sighs out my name, the a sounding like one long breathy syllable and it sends shivers down my spine and I’m hard. Just like that. Adjusting myself, I creep out, glad that the hallway is quiet. All doors are shut and I can escape into my own home unnoticed. The kitchen is dark except for the range light over the hood.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou can spend as much time as you like with her before she leaves, but she is leaving.\u201d<\/p>\n

My hand is on the doorknob but my heart is somewhere around my knees. If I had poor bladder control, I would have pissed myself. At least my boner died.<\/p>\n

\u201cJesus Christ, Aunt AM.\u201d I swear forgetting myself. In the shadows, across the room, sits Charlotte\u2019s mother, a mug in her hand and her tablet in front of her on the breakfast table. I hope she didn’t see me tenting my pants earlier. I won’t die from sperm build up. One of Charlotte’s parents will kill me instead. \u201cI d-didn\u2019t see you,” I stammer out.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo kidding.\u201d I can hear the smirk in her voice. \u201cThe fog comes on little cat feet.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHuh?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cCarl Sandberg.\u201d When I show no understanding, she shakes her head. \u201cSchool\u2019s these days. It\u2019s about the Chicago Harbor! The fog comes on little cat feet. It sits looking over harbor and city on silent haunches and then moves on. You\u2019ve never heard that?\u201d<\/p>\n

It rings a faint bell so I nod but she isn\u2019t buying it. \u201cCome.\u201d She orders. \u201cSit down.\u201d<\/p>\n

I trudge over, my feet slapping heavily against the tiles. She kicks out a chair and I drop into it.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d I ask sullenly feeling like I\u2019m a toddler again and Aunt AM is taking away my favorite toy.<\/p>\n

I can feel her looking at me, but the light from the range hood doesn\u2019t extend over here. The only light is from her tablet which has flickered off. Gone to sleep I guess.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf Charlotte wanted to go to the Navy Pier, would you take her?\u201d<\/p>\n

I know that there is a trap here. I hesitate and it\u2019s my first mistake. \u201cNo,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n

\u201cHow do you stop her? Physically restrain her? And if she tells you that it is fine and that her doctor has okayed it, do you call her a liar?\u201d The questions come rapid fire and I can\u2019t process them all at once. \u201cYou eventually give in because you love her and you think she must know, after this most recent episode put her in the hospital, that she can\u2019t keep hiding her weakness.\u201d<\/p>\n

I nod slowly at this assessment, but I\u2019m uncertain. Would I keep Charlotte from doing something she said she was safe to do? Charlotte can talk me into anything and if she said that it was safe I’d believe her. My tongue is still frozen by doubt. Aunt AM continues on, using my silence against me.<\/p>\n

“And if she had an episode, a seizure or passed out would you blame yourself?\u201d I nod again because anything else would be an obvious lie. “We want to prevent that from happening. Where you\u2019re blaming yourself and Charlotte avoids placing all of you in a bad situation.\u201d
\n\u201cHow long?\u201d I ask.<\/p>\n

“Six maybe nine months. We hope to be back before your senior year and her sophomore year.\u201d<\/p>\n

I\u2019m glad now that we can\u2019t see each other because what I\u2019m feeling right now is something like relief. I shouldn\u2019t feel that way but it\u2019s like Charlotte\u2019s absence will give me time to sort out everything.<\/p>\n

\u201cBefore may 21st?\u201d<\/p>\n

I sense her shrug. “Maybe before her 16th birthday. It depends on how hard Charlotte works at getting better. Does she do everything her doctors ask or does she try to hide her symptoms and pretend she isn’t as sick as she is.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay,\u201d I say. I mean, it\u2019s not like I have a choice in the matter. Aunt AM gets to her feet and gives me a hug. Standing up, I return her embrace already feeling a hundred times better.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s the right thing for all of us,” she murmurs to me.<\/p>\n

“Thanks Aunt AM.\u201d I’m nearly at the connecting door when she calls out.<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t let Bo know you are marking when Charlotte turns 16 or you might not live to see your next birthday.\u201d<\/p>\n

Because I am a stupid and reckless shit I give Aunt AM a salute and a grin. She mock tosses her tablet at me and I disappear down the hall.M y cocky belief that all will work itself out reasserts itself. Six months? Nothing can happen that would affect us in six months. By then Charlotte won’t be so young. Sixteen is perfect. Six months is perfect.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Anxious for the next episode? Sign up for the newsletter here<\/a> and it will be delivered one week early (every Friday) to your inbox.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Don’t forget the release of Unraveled is just around the corner. We even have a pre order link if you…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2475,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-599","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-charlotte-chronicles","category-promo","charlotte-chronicles","promo"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/599","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=599"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/599\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2475"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=599"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=599"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=599"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}