{"id":2386,"date":"2014-07-28T20:04:30","date_gmt":"2014-07-28T20:04:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jenfrederick.com\/?p=2386"},"modified":"2014-07-28T20:04:30","modified_gmt":"2014-07-28T20:04:30","slug":"taking-control-chapter-one","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/taking-control-chapter-one\/","title":{"rendered":"Taking Control – Chapter One"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"takingcontrol-300dpi\"<\/a><\/p>\n

On September 8, 2014, the long awaited sequel to book 1 of the Kerr Duology will be released. Are you ready for Ian Kerr?<\/p>\n

I thought I needed only one thing in my life–the money and power to crush one man. But the moment I laid eyes on Victoria Corielli, my thirst for revenge was replaced by my craving for her.<\/span><\/em>

No rule would keep me away; no obstacle too large to overcome. Not her will, not our differing social positions, not my infamous past. When she lost everything, I helped her pick up the pieces. When she trusted me with everything, she sealed her fate.<\/span><\/em>

I’ve convinced Victoria she can put her heart in my hands. Now I have to protect it–from her shady stepfather and my business rivals, from enemies known and hidden. I’ll do anything to keep her. And I might have to prove it, because now Victoria”s risking more than her heart to be with me; she’s risking her life.<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

Add it to your Goodreads shelf<\/a> today. Curious about book 1? Read more here.<\/a><\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

Chapter One<\/h2>\n

Come ti vidi<\/em><\/p>\n

M\u2019innamorai,<\/em><\/p>\n

E tu sorridi<\/em><\/p>\n

Perch\u00e8 lo sai.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

When I first saw you I fell in love and you smiled because you knew.<\/a><\/p>\n

\u2015 Arrigo Boito, Falstaff<\/em>, II,ii<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Love weakens you. That\u2019s the conclusion I\u2019ve come to as I gaze down at the woman slumbering next to me. Victoria Corielli is a slip of a thing. My hands span her slender waist. In her stocking feet, the top of her head brushes my chin. While she has muscular legs due to her previous occupation as a bike courier, the rest of her is on the slim side\u2014more due to poverty and illness than the intense dieting socialites engage in.<\/p>\n

Despite her size and diminutive nickname, she\u2019s powerful. With a word, a look, a gesture, she can bring me to my knees.<\/p>\n

As if sensing my scrutiny, her body shifts under the sheet, a heady susurration forms as luxurious cotton brushes against equally luxurious flesh.<\/p>\n

Ian.<\/i><\/p>\n

My name on her lips is hardly more than a whisper but it\u2019s enough to send me from contemplative to alert in a heartbeat. It was only hours ago that we fell asleep and yet I find cannot leave her alone.<\/p>\n

I lift one of her legs over my hip and ease into her. She greets me with a murmur that is half gasp, half pleasure.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf this is a dream, don\u2019t wake me,\u201d she moans.<\/p>\n

I huff out a chuckle. \u201cSurely reality with me is better than your dreams.\u201d<\/p>\n

Her lids flutter open and in the moonlit bedroom, her eyes look wide and endless. \u201cI don\u2019t know. I was having a pretty good dream.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat were you doing?\u201d My movements are slow, almost careless. There\u2019s no hurry and that, in and of itself, is an aphrodisiac. I can have her as many times as I need, for as long as I need but I know I won\u2019t ever be sated.<\/p>\n

\u201cI was with this guy. He was tall, dark haired. Wore a big cape.\u201d She smiled sleepily. \u201cHe pinned me down and held my wrists together and told me that I was going to have to suffer endlessly for my sins.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd what was your response?\u201d I roll her onto her back and gather her wrists together, pulling her body taut beneath mine. In the recent weeks, Tiny had been too sorrowful to play with me like this.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat his endless punishment couldn\u2019t start soon enough.\u201d<\/p>\n

Dropping my head to her neck, I breathe in the scent of her warm, aroused body. We\u2019re both drunk on each other and I inhale, wanting to take her inside me and finding it nearly impossible to get close enough. Beneath me, her body tightens like a bow string, quivering and taut.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow,\u201d she growls digging her nails into my hips. \u201cCome with me now now now<\/i>.\u201d<\/p>\n

Her command is my undoing. Whatever idea I had about slow and tender went out the window. I took her then, hard and fast, pounding her until we both explode\u2014her release is screamed out and mine is expelled through gritted teeth.<\/p>\n

Collapsing to the side so I don\u2019t crush her, I pull her limp body close.<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry,\u201d I murmur into her hair, pushing the sweaty strands to one side to expose her temple for a kiss. Her head tucks itself under my chin.<\/p>\n

\u201cFor what? Waking me with an orgasm.\u201d She says sleepily. \u201cPlease be sorry every morning.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s not morning yet, bunny.\u201d<\/p>\n

She cuddles closer and I stroke my hands through her dampened hair and down her back, this time to soothe her and soon her even breathing tells me she is asleep again.<\/p>\n

I get up and dispose of the condom and return with a warm washcloth. She flinches when I press the cloth against her center but doesn\u2019t wake. With a frown, I realize this is the third time tonight we\u2019ve made love. I need to be more careful with her.<\/p>\n

Returning to the bathroom, I toss the cloth in the hamper and then stare into the mirror. Waking her for a third time like some randy teenager with no self control is not like me, but then I haven\u2019t been normal since I met her.<\/p>\n

When I first saw Victoria\u2014or Tiny as her mother called her\u2014on the street delivering a package, I wanted her. I liked the way she carried herself\u2014self-assured and comfortable. I thought her long, blonde hair would look tempting spread out on my pillow. I imagined her thighs would be steel-hard from the biking. She made me laugh when she kicked the doorframe of the store after realizing the shop owner, who needed to sign for the delivery, was missing.<\/p>\n

She made me hard when she stared at my lips like she wanted to taste me.<\/p>\n

\u00a0In those few minutes of interaction between us, I saw a panoply of emotions\u2014<\/span>vulnerability when she considered my request to play hooky and enjoy a day in the park followed by a night in my bed; frustration when her customer was absent; and iron discipline when her sense of\u00a0 responsibility overrode all else. Her unfettered emotionalism was refreshing. But it was when she ran from me and my direct offer of pleasure that my appetite was whetted.<\/p>\n

I was well and truly caught.<\/p>\n

I hadn\u2019t actively avoided love, but I hadn\u2019t sought it out. Why should I? I\u2019d spent most of my thirty-two years fixated on making money. And there were few bedroom doors closed to me. Reasonable attractiveness\u2014made infinitely more so by the thickness of my wallet\u2014ensured that bachelorhood in New York City was easy and entertaining.<\/p>\n

Maybe too easy because her refusal unwittingly transformed her into an irresistible challenge. The more she denied me the more I wanted her. Her mother was ill with cancer, and Victoria believed she couldn\u2019t juggle both my interest and her concern for her mother\u2019s wellbeing.<\/p>\n

My arrogant belief was that money would solve her problems, making it easy for her to slip into my bed. After all, money had solved most of my issues, except one. But the more cash I threw at her, the more barriers she erected.<\/p>\n

Even now, I\u2019m not sure how many walls I\u2019ve managed to tear down, how far inside the citadel of her heart I stand which is why I probably woke her for a third time. Why I can\u2019t keep my hands off her. I\u2019m afraid that all I have binding her to me is the response I can generate in bed.<\/p>\n

The world I live in is inhabited by people whose lust for more<\/i>\u2014whether it\u2019s power or money or influence\u2014drives them to the basest of actions. Show a weakness and someone will attempt to leverage it for their own benefit.<\/p>\n

Tiny had only one thought in her life\u2014to save her mother. It was a story I understood all too well, and the ending was as tragic as I\u2019d suspected it might be. Tiny\u2019s mother lost her battle with cancer.<\/p>\n

In slumber, she seeks my touch, the one thing that has given her pleasure in the weeks after her mother\u2019s death.<\/p>\n

Some might say that I was a lucky son of a bitch\u2014<\/span>in the right place at the right time\u2014<\/span>because she needed someone, anyone, after her mom passed. But I make my own luck. Tiny\u2019s special, and I\u2019ll do anything to keep her.<\/p>\n

There\u2019s a danger that she\u2019ll wake up from her grief-induced fog and realize that I\u2019m a manipulative asshole who is more trouble than he\u2019s worth, but I have time and proximity on my side. I\u2019ve bought my way into her heart and life. I\u2019ll lie, steal, and cheat to stay there because nothing is worth more than her.<\/p>\n

She might not want my money, but she wants me.<\/i> And I\u2019m completely devoted to seeing that she is replete with satisfaction during every waking moment. I simply don\u2019t know if that is enough\u2014for both of us.<\/p>\n

She finds me there in the pre dawn hours, still staring blindlessly in the mirror.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong, Ian?\u201d she asks wrapping her arms around me waist and pressing her face into the valley of my spine. \u201cAnd don\u2019t say nothing because someone who\u2019s perfectly at peace doesn\u2019t stand in his bathroom looking into the mirror for hours. Is it Richard Howe?\u201d<\/p>\n

A sharp bitter laugh escapes me. \u201cI hate that you even know his name. His existence should be unfamiliar to you. He shouldn\u2019t be allowed to breathe the same air, walk the same streets, eat at the same tables as you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Her hand squeezes my shoulder in reassurance. I snort in disbelief. It is Tiny\u2019s mother who passed and she<\/i> is in need of comfort yet here she is trying to saturate me with the warmth and solace of her body.<\/p>\n

\u201cIs it me? Am I preventing you from from taking action?\u201d<\/p>\n

Pulling her arm around my waist, I try to answer. \u201cIt\u2019s not you. It\u2019s never been you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy have you waited so long to pull the trigger on him? Metaphorically speaking,\u201d she rushes to add. \u201cI\u2019m not suggesting you should have murdered him or something but why the kid gloves? The man embezzled money and blamed it on your father. He…hurt your mother and because of him you had to grow up on your own. You have had the power to ruin him for years.\u201d<\/p>\n

Her explanation of the horror my life had turned into after my father\u2019s death is laughably euphemistic. My father had a heart attack after being blamed for a seven figure embezzlement\u00a0 orchestrated by Richard Howe, my father\u2019s prot\u00e9g\u00e9. My mother killed herself in an Atlantic City jail after prostituting herself to Howe. I\u2019d left that jail with her few effects vowing revenge\u2026and then I met Tiny.<\/p>\n

And somehow the need to have her in my life had superceded my desire for retribution. At least momentarily.<\/p>\n

Tiny is correct. Richard Howe is the scum of the earth. The ironic thing is that he is the one that brought us together.<\/p>\n

I’d been good at compartmentalization, putting each person or activity in its own separate mental file drawer. Trying to ignore the strength of my developing feelings for her, I thought to use her against Richard. But she wouldn\u2019t remain in one area, instead, her influence crept into every aspect of my life.<\/p>\n

I was wholly unprepared for the depth of my feelings for Tiny. Or, more likely, I had been denying them. I wanted her but hadn’t realized until the moment I saw them together, not even touching, that I’d rather burn the whole world down than have another man lay a finger on her.<\/p>\n

I tried to swallow down the rage and allow Tiny to lure him in, but as each minute ticked by and he stood close enough to touch her, my anger was stoked hotter and hotter. And when he took her on the dance floor and placed his fucking hands on her my restraint was ripped to shreds. There would be no joy in my life without her. I wished I had realized it earlier.<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you know what you\u2019re doing?\u201d Kaga had asked me at the time. \u201cIf you walk out there, he\u2019s going to know what she means to you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf I watch him try to touch her ass one more time, you\u2019ll be visiting me in prison.\u201d I\u2019d said.<\/p>\n

That he even knows her name is my own goddamn fault.<\/p>\n

I rubbed my forehead. \u201cWhen I first returned to the city, I had these grand ideas that I\u2019d storm his townhome and wrench a confession out of him. It didn\u2019t take long to realize that he\u2019d never confess. I kept making money and in the meantime, I\u2019d buy up his debt. About eight years ago, I had enough of his debt that I could have made it difficult for him but then at a party, his wife approached me. I don\u2019t think she remembered me or she knew who I was. She just came up out of the blue and started telling me about how she\u2019d volunteered at a woman\u2019s crisis hotline and how empowering it was. Would I be interested in donating?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo she stayed your hand?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes. Every time I was in a position to do something to Howe, I\u2019d see her at an event. She\u2019d share her latest charitable activities with me. She was doing things that could have helped my mother. Could I be the instrument of her ruin as Howe was for my mother? I found I couldn\u2019t. And I felt sorry for her because Richard cheated on her regularly. She had to know about his infidelity. Discretion wasn\u2019t important to him although he rarely hunted in their social circles. He preferred the working class\u2014waitresses, models\u2014which are often one and the same in the city. Women he viewed as disposable. It was clear to everyone that she loved him. Her eyes would follow him across the room and now that I have you, I really see it. How deeply devoted she is to him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou thought that a scandal would separate her from him.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, even if it would be painful, if I could decouple her from him then I wouldn\u2019t have her wounds on my conscience.\u201d I shook my head. \u201cI\u2019ll think of something else.\u201d<\/p>\n

She presses her face close to my chest. Between my arms, I feel her trembling. \u201cWhat is it?\u201d I ask urgently.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re amazing Ian Kerr.\u201d She rains kisses on my shoulders and at the base of my neck.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you were another woman, I\u2019d say you were buttering me up for something but since you won\u2019t even take what I\u2019m willing to give you without argument, I\u2019m going to have to ask. Are you on drugs? Because I distinctly remember you calling me an arrogant asshole more than once.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat was before I realized that you needed me help to correct your character flaws. I\u2019m here now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re like a missionary then, to save me from myself?\u201d I\u2019m only half joking.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s right and from all the other women in New York City. I\u2019m sacrificing myself on the altar of Ian Kerr\u2019s pleasure in order to prevent heartbreak and sorrow across the city.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou deserve sainthood.\u201d I pulled her tight against me and kissed her in gratefulness for driving away my moodiness.<\/p>\n

\u201cIn honor of my impending deification, will you take me to bed and make me see heaven again?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMmmm,\u201d I murmur against her lips. \u201cI\u2019m sorry but no. You\u2019re too swollen and tender.\u201d<\/p>\n

She draws away from me although the circle of my arms doesn\u2019t allow her to get far. \u201cAre you feeling sick? Because I swear I heard you turn me down.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m not turning you down. I\u2019m\u2026delaying our gratification until later.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDelayed gratification is for suckers. I want you now.\u201d She looks determined but I get my way. Always.<\/i><\/p>\n

Picking her up, I carry her back to the bed. \u201cI\u2019ll take care of you bunny,\u201d and slide down her body until I\u2019m kneeling between her legs.<\/p>\n

Softly, tenderly, as if she were a virgin, I stroke her delicate lips. Her clit slowly emerges, as if jealous of the attention given to her other body parts. I lick my thumb and rub it lightly across the tip.<\/p>\n

\u201cIan,\u201d she moans. My name on her lips in that breathy tone has the same effect as mainlining aphrodisiacs. My already-erect cock throbs in response. I\u2019m starting to believe in soul mates and life in the hereafter, because one lifetime won\u2019t be enough with Victoria Corielli.<\/p>\n

Sliding my palms under her ass, I lift her to my mouth.<\/p>\n

There is so much for me to learn about her body, about what she wants and where she wants it. We haven\u2019t even started talking about fantasies. I\u2019ll do her any way that turns her on, in every place, and in every position. I know she likes my mouth between her legs, but her enthusiasm at giving me pleasure isunexpected.<\/p>\n

When she has me in her mouth, her eyes become heavy-lidded with desire and her juices drip down to coat her thighs. She sucks me as if my cock is the only thing she\u2019s ever wanted\u00a0 and she\u2019s afraid it will be the last time she can pleasure me.<\/p>\n

The memory of her excitement at giving me head spurs me on. Her voice\u2014hoarse after I\u2019ve fucked her throat hard\u2014telling me how much she loves sucking me off echoes in my head, a mental soundtrack I replay repeatedly. I need to hear her screams now. Those noisy affirmations of how much she needs me are the most amazing morning wakeup calls in the world.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m too horny right now to lick her slowly. I need to feel her orgasm all over my face, to have her thighs clench my head in a vise grip, like nothing is ever going to separate the two of us.<\/p>\n

I suck at her lips, separating the folds with my tongue. Placing my thumb\u2014wet from her arousal\u2014on her clit, I tease her with tongue and lips until her thighs are moving restlessly beside my head, bumping my ears.<\/p>\n

The taste of her is making me wild. My cock is thick and hard and even the expensive sheets are chafing my sensitive skin. Inside her, my mental caveman grunts. Need inside her.<\/p>\n

I thrust my fingers inside, curling them forward until I find that small, spongy spot that makes her cry out.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh shit, Ian.\u201d The hand on my head tightens and my scalp begins to protest, but the pain brings a smile to my face. She\u2019s getting there. It\u2019s heaven down here<\/i>. I could live here, her juices sustaining me for days. Opening my mouth wide, I engulf her pussy. Every little crevice is explored and sucked until her whole body stiffens and arches in front of me. Her soft walls are starting to convulse and her thighs tighten.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s it, bunny. Just let go.\u201d I lap at her, maintaining the rhythm that brought her to the peak. She pulses her hips against my fingers and mouth. I torture her with my lips, tongue, and fingers until she\u2019s crying out my name and pulling and pushing against me at the same time. Wrapping my free arm under her thighs and up around her waist to hold her against my mouth, I devour her as she bucks against me. A wild, keening sound erupts from her, and I suck down her come as it streams onto my tongue.<\/p>\n

\u00a0\u201cHave I told you that I love you?\u201d she whispers and pulls me to her for a fierce kiss. Her teeth nip at mine and then our mouths are fused. For long moments, the only air that we breathe is through each other. Breaking away, she pants and presses soft kisses along my jaw and down my neck.<\/p>\n

\u201cOnly once today.\u201d I smooth her hair back. We\u2019ve made a mess of it. The long blonde strands are tangled and matted, but she\u2019s never looked sexier. My gut tightens at the thought that others have seen her in this just-fucked state.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s that look for?\u201d she asks, smoothing a hand across my sweat-dampened skin.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m a jealous fucker.\u201d Roughly, I kiss her as if I can brand her with my mouth. No one but me will ever get to see her this disheveled again.<\/p>\n

\u201cAre you just figuring that out, because it was pretty evident a few weeks ago when you dragged me out of the bar by my hair.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt was by your hand, but if you\u2019re okay with the hair dragging, I can pull that off the next time we\u2019re out.\u201d<\/p>\n

She pinches me lightly. \u201cNo, I\u2019m not into the hair dragging thing. I\u2019m not against a little hair pulling, though.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs that right?\u201d My tone is light, but her words have made my cock harder than marble.<\/p>\n

\u201cThis can\u2019t be comfortable.\u201d Her hand dips down to stroke me and I shudder at the caress.<\/p>\n

Comfortable? No. \u201cIt\u2019ll go away if you ignore it,\u201d I lie.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t want to ignore it. I want it inside me.\u201d<\/p>\n

I shake my head. \u201cYou\u2019re too sore, bunny.\u201d I rub a finger over her lips, shiny and plump from our kisses. \u201cI\u2019ll hurt you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll feel worse if you don\u2019t,\u201d she pleads.<\/p>\n

Her gentle begging makes me even harder, and I feel a twinge of guilt that her helpless desire turns me on even more. A decent man wouldn\u2019t feel good about hearing his woman beg. Hell, a decent man probably never refers to his companion as his woman. But since I raised myself from the age of thirteen, I\u2019ve developed my own rules and my own code.<\/p>\n

I want. I take. I keep.<\/i><\/p>\n

Tiny belongs to me now, and I\u2019m not letting her go. She\u2019s mine to love and to care for.\u00a0Right now that means controlling my own need to fuck her again, no matter how hard she begs for it.<\/span><\/p>\n

<<<< >>>><\/p>\n

Prepare yourself for Ian Kerr.\u00a0Add him\u00a0to your\u00a0Goodreads shelf<\/a>\u00a0today.<\/p>\n

Curious about book 1?\u00a0Read more here.<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

On September 8, 2014, the long awaited sequel to book 1 of the Kerr Duology will be released. Are you…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2460,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2386","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-writing-stuff","writing-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2386","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2386"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2386\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2460"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2386"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2386"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jenfrederick.com\/test\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2386"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}